Are You Living In Heart Or Ego?
Heart centered awareness is so important and a necessity for us in order to cultivate the world we wish to experience. Self love is a disparity because often there was not an example to mirror what a healthy balanced relationship with self and other looks like. With so much cultural influence we receive subliminal messages that we are not enough. Meanwhile, religious institutions tell us that we are born of sin, which is a way of saying that we have been born into a world of ego due to a belief that we are separate from God. This feeds a repetitious cycle of ancestral stories within a festering unawakened world. Wounds are ignored, passing on unhealed stories and beliefs of shame, separation and victimization that pass through generations. All creating an imbalance, feeding the egoic thoughts that create a matrix of dense energy that cover the heart center of Love and Truth. It is why Jesus urged us all to “Seek the Kingdom of Heaven Within” and to not stop seeking until found.
Our awakening into self- love and truth becomes a path of learning how to walk in beauty for not only ourself but for those who are among us and those who will come after us. Thus, if we are to truly love another, we must learn how to love ourself, going back to the teachings of Indigenous wisdom of bridging the distance between the mind and heart, and the eastern philosophies of the egoic mind play, which leads one into a gradual synchronistic unfolding, mind unraveling journey into the “I AM..”.
In our journey of cultivating an awareness of the ego and heart, here are some important aspects that we should be aware of in order to learn how to fully embody our truth.
SELF AWARENESS OF EGO AND THOUGHTS
The ego, if not tamed acts from an animal reaction of instinct based from the past, where there is no rational awareness of the present moment. The ego feels it is the body, it is the mind, it is the thoughts. A separate entity from the grass and sky, animals and the elements, mother and father, brother and sister, as well as strangers i.e the interconnected web of life.
To grow beyond the mind constructs of the ego that often disempower, it is imperative that we begin to bring awareness to our thoughts. It is in this space that we can see, feel and know when we are in the moment of the lower ego or heart. Recognizing the ego's theatrics helps us to stop the pattern and drop into the spaciousness of the heart, and live from our higher self, our eternal nature that is non-judgmental, compassionate and neutral towards oneself and others. Through introspection and contemplation we access a well of knowledge, cultivating an embodied sense of true self- a state that holds the ego accountable to the heart. Harnessing the power of the ego comes from understanding the associations of the negative mind, why and where they come from, which equates to a wonderful release and unattached knowing that your ego is not the real you, it’s just a tool to allow us to navigate this world of duality.
THE I, THE ME, THE YOU
In order to begin our steps in self-awareness, we need to become familiar with our own sense of self and the beliefs held about the interactive world of materiality and spirit.
As for your own sense of ego, it is the "I" image you have about yourself and what face you put on for the world. The titles you cling to and the roles you take on to support the way you want to be seen. Do you present yourself as the athlete, business entrepreneur, peace maker, shiny and happy, etc? The list is infinite. But what the ego loves to do, is to make us feel different from others. It enjoys comparing and contrasting. It loves attention and desires to feel special. It loves to Judge. When Jesus was talking about not judging another, he was talking directly to the yogic and other numerous eastern teachings of the egoic mind which creates a feeling of our individuality of being separate from everything, which creates our judgements about our story and others, which is all built upon a sensory world of attachment and aversion that keeps us feeling safe and contained.
Is it wrong to say we are this or that? Of course not, but in order to grow into the heart there should be a recognition that our human experience is very impermanent, and our roles are always changing. We each are a multiplicity of oneness, conveying a different aspect of God consciousness. It’s why in spiritual paths all over the world there is a representation of all kinds of gods, deities, archetypes and angels. All different personas of the working organism of community, of our servanthood and gifts and healing reflections we bring one another.
As we grow in our heart center we move away from judgments that feed the illusion that we are separate from anything or anyone, and we see how the whole of our relationships and creation, is working as one beautiful orchestra. Each singing one another home.
THE AMPLIFIED EGO
Without a growing self- awareness and compassion for self and other, a person's ego amplifies and takes control, creating an imbalance of thought and monkey mind.
You know that you are caught by the ego when you take things personally, becoming judgmental and jealous. You become rigid, fearful and stuck in a circling of thought patterns. Consumed by emotions, easily hurt by others actions and external situations. Your inner dialogue zooms in toward anxieties and self-criticisms that demise your self worth. Thus, your ego is fed by the need of validation from others and you are easily bruised when things don't go your way, or people easily offend you.
The ego has expectation, but we quickly learn that this only brings disappointment. Rather than experiencing life's constant change and being in a state of neutrality which is the inherent truth of our eternal being, when we are caught by the ego there is anxiety through a timidness or over exertion of control and manipulation, where we find ourself easily hurt and swayed from peace.
The ego loves attention and if continually fed, becomes addicted to it to the point it becomes out of control, and it will stop at nothing to get its way creating conditions that stifle the heart and it’s capacity to feel and embody life. When turned inward the lower ego looks like the self-critic, tyrant, saboteur or the narcissist.
Protection mechanisms are created to attach and avert away from the totality of life and relationship, due to experiences that have made one feel less than. We know this is the case when there is a numbness in the body, or resistance toward allowing uncomfortable feelings or thoughts to be expressed, yet subconsciously these feelings are magnifying and magnetizing more and more suffering.
One must learn how to feel again, disbarring the hurt and stories of the past, so the ego can be built up to feel secure and enlivened. Often, in healing sessions people with such shutdown will come out with a sudden grandioseness, taking on the character of who suppressed their ego as a child. It can take weeks before this subsides, for the ego is waking itself up to find a healthier equilibrium.
Like in anything, a healthy balance of ego needs to be established and it starts by bringing awareness to where we are in relationship with our own ego and heart. Where is that the ice needs to melt within our heart? Our relationships are direct sign posts as to where we need to venture.
THE HEART
When we drop into the heart, we are feeling and connected to everything around us. We are awakened, living in our soul self. We feel from our innate spirit perspective, no longer hindered by the small human mind, but connected to source. It is an impersonal state of being that melts the personality of me, he and she. It is who you are without labels, roles, expectations and social masks. A state that is always there even when you are living in the moment of ego. The part of you that never changes and is forever the divine energy of the Universe that flows through all things.
Living from your soul self, your true self, your intuition is potent and in tune with everything around you. Your inner voice guides you. Your love and acceptance of self and others flows without protective mechanisms or conditions. Your goals and desires are clearly supported not by your sense of self-worth, but by a deep knowing and insight of the gifts you have to offer the world. You accept people as they are and are able to forgive easily, with an understanding of accountability and trust in the arrival of discomforts, now viewed as teaching and growth moments that expand and push us into greater power and love. You find that everyone around you is a mirror of your wounded nature, your grievances and your strengths. Thus, you walk openly without fear, accepting the story as it flows, informing as to what part of you is growing wilder into greater states of truth and freedom.
Your creativity bubbles up from within you, and their is a deep motivating force that flows. You find yourself being lost in the moment of now, feeling an indescribable connection to everything around you. When in the heart, all of nature is speaking to you through every encounter and all that shows up, letting you know you are on the right or wrong path. It is truly a dance that feels effortless, as if your being is pushed or gently carried by the enormous power of the unseen. You feel free, fearless and empowered in following your dharma, knowing your unique purpose and gifts were given to you for a reason. To be acted upon, not wasted in a moment of frivolity. Knowing that we each are unique expressions of Source.
Our heart and spirit are ever present and eternal, but we are living out a soul story in a human body that is continually reaching toward it’s divine expression. Although there is awareness of our eternal nature, we can easily slip back into the moment of the ego. The beauty is that when we are in the moment of mindful awareness, we recognize our grand theatrics with clarity. We see how our words and thoughts derail us, and our trapped roles of identity bind and define. There is a realization that our repetitive fears, worry, superficial desires, blind spots of judgment or wrong actions come back to school us, until we fully sink into a greater expansive heart centered ease. A newer but deeper layer of our story arises, the ego we thought we released exacerbates suddenly, rubbing us wrong. With guided awareness we dismantle our ego, we present ourselves to see through our created illusion. Our subtle haunting deformities of the past are ushered into a stillness of mind, allowing higher states of awareness of compassion for self and other.
Living from the heart is a journey, a slow dissolution of our lower animal like qualities that levitates us beyond our human temple into our eternal spirit self. With each discovery of truth and embodied experience, we transmute our soul density into our original light body of peace.
It is our hearts' only desire to love deeper and expand wider into our awareness and authenticity, truth and luminous being. All which can never be defined or put into a box. For we are nothing and everything at the same time. Each an extension and unique expression of God in this dense human bio suit that can spread wings and fly, but first we must learn to shed the heavy coils of the ego.
Are you ready to sink into your heart through Depth Hypnosis or other offerings at Seeds of Satya?
Kari Rivers works in person and remotely worldwide individually, and in Group workshops in Denver, CO & Asheville NC on sacred land that nurtures the body, mind, heart and soul, connecting you to your intuition, truth and magic that we are one with everything seen and unseen.