DEAR MOTHER, YOUR DAUGHTER NEEDS…

Dear Mother,

Our Daughters are growing up so fast. I know you feel it. As a mother you can’t help but feel the shift and cycles of time. The heart echoes with a constant rhythm of duality, the grief and joy that only the experience of motherhood can gift.

She’s growing and transforming before your eyes. Growing into the beautiful Goddess she is, yet also trying to make sense of a world that finds its way into the deepest crevices of our shadow. No matter how much we try to protect and shelter her precious innocence, she’s destined to face her soul’s wrinkled delusions, just as we have had to do.

OUR DESIRE

As a mother, we desire to help her and guide her. We want to be apart of her life, to give her life assisting tools. To connect with her in a meaningful way that we wish we’d had.

NATURE HAPPENS

As a mother, we eventually witness her will to separate from the womb, the hive, the nest. This can occur through her own quietude, a resistant nature, a hiding away, and a deliberate defiance. This is typical and can often really be felt around age 14, sometimes even younger. A sign that they have begun their own inner Odyssey, diving deep into the underworld driven by subconscious beliefs and memories. Nature’s theatrical adventure of reclaiming oneself.

WHAT WE TEND TO FORGET

At certain times mothers can often think, “What did I do?” due to great storms of feeling. One moment beaming with confidence, the next unworthy with sadness and scorn, engulfed in a shifting tide of emotion. As Robert Musil wrote, “emotions go jolting through us like electric impulses, engulfing the entire world, then shriveling into nothing: sadness, tenderness, nobility, and a generosity of spirit that forms into the empty skies above us.”

These perils of puberty is largely caused by the limbic system, known as the emotional center deep inside the brain. It is functioning at an accelerated rate; meanwhile the frontal lobes that govern reserve, reflection and restraint are not mature until nineteen or twenty years old.

WHAT WE DON’T OFTEN REALIZE

The adventures within our own adolescent twilight zone can often replay the same themes within our child’s mind and life story. It is a beautiful but challenging chance for things to heal and move beyond ancestral story into a far more balanced way. Her experience might even play out in an even wilder way in order to get our attention, and this might be taken to an extreme in a way in which we ourselves wish we had or had judgements about. After all, they did come from our own womb essence.

Our desires and aversions play out in our daughter’s own experience, as a means to show us our own triggers, where we have lost energy, and that which we need to unravel our own beliefs and judgements that keep us bound. It takes a needle to dig out the thorn, for the Mother & Father of us all is infinitely intelligent in this design of illusion to help us overcome our own hindrances. The World is our mirror.

WHAT SHE REALLY WANTS

Regardless of her actions, her desires are yours, mine, the collective desire to be seen, heard, held, and accepted.

She appreciates your attempts for meaningful connection and will remember your compassionate presence within a mixed up, upside world that confuses her and makes no sense to her. Your calm mind, steadfast desire to connect, to support, to be present with her in the midst of her shifting adolescent tide is so appreciated.

She needs you to show up courageously with honesty and integrity, even when you feel rejected by her actions. She wants to know she’s not alone.

WHAT SHE NEEDS

She needs tools, just as we all do, to navigate life.

She needs to know how to connect with her intuition and her wisdom.

She needs to know that she is not her body or her mind.

She needs to remember that she is a Soul. She is Spirit. And that can only happy with powerful experiences that awaken us to our truth.

To learn and expand in a healthy and sacred container with your daughter is an incredible and precious journey, where you both are working to heal your lineage and change the world one moment at a time.

In the midst of all her change, she needs you to remember and recognize her true essence and keep reminding her of it.

LET’S BE HONEST

Let’s be honest, mothering is not always so easy, especially when her wounds touch our own. Yet, it’s such a beautiful moment showing us the places we have and have not been liberated from the past. And let’s face it, even when we know how to guide and show up for our daughter, she can sometimes not hear it from us. Yet, she can hear it from another.

WHY A SUPPORTIVE SACRED CIRCLE IS SO IMPORTANT

A supportive sacred circle creates meaningful connection and sharing that can transport us into a new way of seeing life. We see that we all are transforming, struggling and succeeding in some unique adventure of the soul.

A circle helps us to get real with ourselves and one another, to open to our vulnerability, and connect with our body, emotions, intuition and wisdom.

There is power in a supportive sacred circle where you are witnessed, and are witnessing others. It’s healing because energy moves more dynamically and intentionally when many come together: for when others encircle us, there is a movement and a support built from a grounded awareness in which we can swim more fluidly through the deeper waters of our experience. A space in which we can be enlivened and inspired by our discoveries, learning from one another’s mistakes and wisdom.

Last but not least, your daughter is just like you. She is created to be a social creature who finds a sense of belonging, safety and balance WITH other people. We all need relationship. We need each other to recognize our pitfalls and even our deepest desires and gifts. We need willing vulnerable hearts to deeply connect with our own, so that we can all learn how to fly across the precipices of life with grace and resilience. We need others to celebrate in our wins. This grows our gratitude, and all of life responds in that energy, creating an expansive freedom, JOY. This is the delicious beauty of life.

MAIDEN MOTHER CIRCLE

Maiden Mother Circle is a heart calling to unite mothers and daughters into a sacred space where we learn and discover together, honoring each others wisdom.

It is a supportive safe space of love, laughter, discovery, creativity and vulnerability.

We don’t have to do this alone. Nor were we ever meant too.

Will you join Us? Click on image below and it will take you directly to the event page.

Luminous Blessings,

Kari Rivers